Wrong Question- A Cute Mini Story
By: S A Spencer
His love for food came on the way of romance he had. Will migration to another continent help him get both?
Picture by Greg Byman
“I will go to Canada for hunting.” Jim said as
we both met at the Woodcroft Lake Park during our morning walk. A huge smile spread
across his face.
“Oh! Canada! Have a pleasant trip.” I came
close to him on the jogging track. “When are you going?”
Something inside me showed this wasn’t true.
Only yesterday evening, we both were sipping beer at my alfresco after he
volunteered to fix our outdoor blind. How suddenly he made such a decision?
Overnight?
Having the morning walk together was not our
routine. We knew each other since the day he moved to the street after building
our dream houses. Mine was the first house on the street. Situated fifteen
blocks away from my lot, Jim was the second house-owner and my only neighbour
for almost six months before any other house came up or even got occupants.
“Last night. Hello, how are you?” Jim said the
second sentence to the young Vietnamese looking woman walking past us from the
other direction.
I cast a sideways glance at her; she was
beautiful. Saw her first time in our locality. “You know her?”
“Nope. Who knows, if I meet her more frequently
in the park, one day she could be my girlfriend.”
An urge came in me to play a joke. “She is , in
fact….”
He slowed down and tilted his head. Curiosity mirrored
in his eyes. “What?”
“She is married, two kids.” I tried to keep my face
as stern as possible.
He chuckled and paced ahead of me. “Damn.”
Jim always took the jokes with a pinch of salt.
We walked silently for some time. Old memories of the days we both had just began
friendship threaded into my mind.
I was the happiest man in the world, so was my
wife Sony, as this was our first dream home, with a large front and backyard
for gardening.
On the other hand,…
Jim was the most miserable man. Just a day
before he could move in, his wife announced she was in love with another
man and asked for a divorce. Not only that, but she also cited a solid reason
for that. Jim’s love for animals and birds suffocated her.
Even though we were fairly new
friends for over a month when he was visiting the street to check on the
progress of his house, he opened his mind to me.
And I was at a loss whether to sympathise
with him for his loss of family life or laugh at his wife’s reasons. “Loving
animals and birds shouldn’t be a cause for trouble to anybody, Jim.”
“She is from an
Asian country and her English is terrible. In fact, she is a strict vegetarian
and I love to eat lots of meats. I love lamb doesn’t mean I am in love with a
lamb. Rather, I like to eat lamb meat. She can’t even tolerate the smell of
non-vegetarian food.”
But those days were
gone. He fully recovered. He would drop in my home at any odd moment and be a
spontaneous guest. My wife has never objected to him joining us for a drink or
even dinner at a brief notice. He would enjoy our hospitality and we loved his handyperson
skills and his help in fixing various small things on our property.
“What are you thinking, mate?” Jim’s
question dragged me out of the old memories.
“Yes, you said you are going to Canada.
What will you do there? Love their animals the way you loved here? Devour their
meats and give moksha to their souls?
A loud laugh. “Yes, I will love
their animals. The reality is, a type of pigs which is said to be so
intelligent is causing immense harm to the farmers and their other wildlife. I
will hunt and eat their tasty meats. For free. No, I might even get paid for shooting.
They have a shortage of hunters.”
“A new job in Canada! You mean
someone is hiring you for hunting the wild pigs? What is so great about them?”
We finished the third round on
the path around the park. The woman Jim had said ‘hello’ had crossed us a few
times and Jim never even looked at her again.
“You don’t know? In fact, they
are super intelligent and almost invincible. Almost eradicating other wild
species in their craving for food and even destroying farmlands.”
“Are they some types of alien
animals? Came from another planet which might be thousands of light years away?”
I imagined a sci-fi movie I was watching with my daughter a few weeks ago. “You
see, Jim, only animals from a different world can be more intelligent than
humans on the earth.”
Jim chuckled. “You are going too far,
mate. The fact is, someone crossbred them using wild boar and common pigs so
that they could tolerate extreme cold climate. But a few years ago, the demand
for their meat went to rock bottom, and some farmers let them loose and closed
their shops. The pigs quickly multiplied in numbers and are now a disaster in
the areas they are spreading out.”
“I see.” I looked at my
smart-watch, almost going to complete the ten thousand steps I aimed for. “Is
this the sole reason you are travelling there? For how many days?”
“No, this is not the reason.”
“Then what?”
“The question was incorrect in
the first place, mate. You asked what I will do there. Should have asked why I
am going.”
“Okay, I am correcting my
question now. Why are you going to Canada?”
He smiled and stopped near a
shed. “Come and sit here.”
We straddled on the bench, face
to face.
“Promise you wouldn’t tell
anybody. Not even to your wife.”
“What is so secret?”
“The fact is, I have got a girlfriend
there. Internet. Then realised I can’t bring her here as my ex-wife had got
visa by marrying me. She had a lover before and used me to get Australian
citizenship. Once she got her Australian passport, she dumped me and brought
her boyfriend to the country. I have to wait five years to import the Canadian
woman here. So, she asked me to shift to Canada instead.”
I got up. Time to begin work.
“She is importing you, a
boyfriend. Congratulations, mate. So, you selling this house?”
“Not yet. Let me see that woman
really exists, and this is not another trap.”
I closed my eyes for a few beats,
“This means you don’t trust her. Right?”
“ I don’t trust the internet.”
I had to suppress my smile. “Best
of luck, mate. See you again.”
S A Spencer- I am endeavoring to bring more stories for your entertainment. Please follow me through the social media icons on the side bar.
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